Journey of Courage and Faith

Pathway

Your soul will move you always deeper within yourself. You cannot stop that process any more than you can stop aging.…[T]he mystic in you longs to go home; it longs to stop running from a fear of chaos.…You want to trust life itself and the God that gave you life. You want to surrender yourself into that same cosmic trust that the mystics had—and have—that your needs will be met. You want to find your highest potential. You want to heal from the burdens of resentment.…

Ultimately, this is a journey about personal courage and faith; your soul knew long before now that you would inevitably enter your Castle [the Castle that is you]. Caroline Myss Entering the Castle Page 79

Odessa Monastery

When I entered an Anglican Convent in 1964, I did so believing that I would never leave there again. I wholeheartedly gave my self to God and, in 1971 I made my final vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience to God, within the Order of St. John the Divine in Toronto, Canada.

I felt called to become a nun and followed that call. No one was more surprised than I was when I felt called to leave the convent in 1980. As Caroline Myss said, in the quoted words above, “Your soul will move you always deeper within yourself. You cannot stop that process any more than you can stop aging.”

I felt called to enter the convent; I felt called by God to leave the convent and enter into the world once more. God had much to teach me in the convent; I learned much about my own short-comings, both spiritual and emotional; I grew in love of God and love of others; but God had so much more to teach me and God showed me that I could not learn more of God’s teachings where I was. I had to leave everything behind and follow Our Lord.

I had to surrender and trust myself to God knowing that my needs would be met even though all my supports had been cut away. It was not without sorrow and guilt that I left the convent, my vows, and my old life within the community of sisters where I had everything and wanted for nothing. God’s ways are not always straightforward. I was taken on a way that I had not expected but my soul leads me ever on to a deeper union with God through a journey of courage and faith.

© Judith Lawrence

Called by God

Labyrinth Walk

Once you are called, you have no choice but to follow. …The call awakens you to what is beyond.

The masters also reveal that we do have the strength and faith deep within our spiritual core to answer the call and embark on the journey into the beyond. …Once you open yourself to God, once God shines a direct light within your soul, your life becomes a journey of faith. Mysteries will seem to fill you to overflowing, but faith and prayer will help you face both the known and the unknown. Caroline Myss Entering the Castle Page 17/18

We are called by God to be united with him. The initial call, when answered, is a once in a lifetime call but there may be many other calls as we journey along—calls of redirection, calls of renewal, calls to rededicate ourselves to God.

“The call awakens you to what is beyond,” says Caroline Myss, and the thought of what is ahead of us, if we answer that call, may scare us into trying to evade giving God a positive response to his call.

We have read of the excuses given by Moses when God asked him to lead the Israelites out of Egypt (Exodus 3); we have seen the evasion of Jonah when he was called to prophesy to the people of Nineveh (Book of Jonah); we have heard how the religious leader responded to Jesus by turning away in sadness when he was told, “There is still one thing you haven’t done. Sell all your possessions and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.” Luke 18: 22

When we receive a call from God we also receive the strength and faith needed to respond to that call. We will need to call up the strength and faith deep within us in order to answer God’s call and a daily prayer life will assist us to face both the known and unknown as we go along our spiritual journey.

© Judith Lawrence